I'M GETTING SICK OF FAILURE

I tried.  I swear to God, I tried.  Desperate times calls for desperate measures, so I tried.

I made his favorite food.  I put our son to bed early.  I tried to get his attention, but was rejected...again.  I don't know how much more my ego can take.  I'm mortified.

A half-hour ago, after he went to bed (IN THE GUEST ROOM), I was literally crying in the bathtub and praying for guidance.  Now, I'm sitting bleary-eyed in front of the computer, and I'm still miserable.   I wish that I had a husband that did not take me for granted--I really do.   I desperately need support from him so that my mind does not start to wander.  The problem is that I know exactly where to find the support I need, but it's not an option.  I wish it were that easy.

I'm wishing so many things at this point.  I'm close to the edge, and hoping that I will not fall.

THE NOT SO NATURAL

Well, I've come to realize that Derek is not a natural soccer player.  He barely runs to the ball and spends most of his time twirling to see his shadow.  He does like that shadow.  It's hard to believe that it was his last game.  I'm going to miss watching him play :(

After the game, I drove Derek to the mall and we went to Sprinkle City. I was going to take him to see a movie, but I didn't know what time Philip was going to be home from work.  Had to get dinner ready, etc.  The lasagna came out great as usual.  Love that stuff.

After ice cream and lasagna today, I can safely say that I'm off the diet until Monday.